UK and USA possibilities

Today whilst in the coffee shop enjoying a coffee, I felt this feeling of what I can only describe as love and appreciation, You see I live in the UK, Well England to be more specific, And have so far 20+ years it's something that once I got to 20 I just kinda lost count of the years so now whenever someone asks me how long I've lived here I just add the + sign so I don't have to actually think about the time. But Lately I been on a different road in my life, going through spiritual growing pains, OR maybe to put it more bluntly Spiritual awakening/ Kundalini awakening. It feels like a mesh of two. kinda like two seasons that smash together if that is even humanly possible. Still, I been om this road of finding my way financially. I been reading books lately which doesn't seem to be me, I never was (as now i actually am) a book person, I stumbled across a book that got me started. But the thing i am noticing is I had this idea of wanting to make my relationship for the lack of the word better with how I see money. I also noticed that I went from job to job never lasting and when I mean NEVER I actually me NEVER even from my first job at 16. I always hated to be told what to do, I somehow was and still am a rebel to some sorts. But only this year I have realized and took the leap to stop working. I think it took some faith and the fact I am lucky to have someone support this for me whilst I am on this journey. It started with me selling on ebay more, then I got fired up, then got scammed (but hey that's business right?) to then getting super anxiety about the sound coming up on ebay thinking its someone complaining, I then stumbled to Amazon selling etc. Still I have this burning desire to work between two countries ( england and america) I mean all my family lives in America so it gives me more opportunities then most, To be a reseller, OR to craft etc. Being between two countries has never been easy, I miss my family then i miss england when I am in America, it's like a never ending battle I can't win. But then i realized lately that because I am so passionate to be able to deal with money in both countries. I thought the only way I can see family more and have the financial freedom I so desire and so deserve is to make it work in two countries somehow, someway What once seemed like a hardship me being in England and my family being in US, Has flipped itself into an idea that not many people can have it takes pain and missing to a whole other level. Sure it doesn't mean it will be easy. HArdship flows where ever in the universe you may ride but you deal with it when it comes And if you are passionate about what you want and know what you don't want, Who can stop you? The fact it could open many doorways i never knew possible makes it that much more exciting. ITs begs the question on HOW it can work? and what i do to make that happen? Then it makes me question Can I really make the impossible, possible? would this path completely change me even more then i am already changing at this very moment? Will I loose people along this path? along this way? Will it consume me to the point I live and breath being who i am meant to be? can I go against the grain and tread where others do not dare to tread? Can I pursue something I have yet to know what i'm pursuing? Could this take me down many other paths into a big circle, Just when I think I know where i am going I suddenly don't? Who knows ? But it will sure be fun giving this a go! whatever it may lead me.

Love

What is love? Love has any factors to it as I found out this week, I had a spiritual awakening to a point, My heart opened and for once in my life i actually wrote a letter from the heart and not the head! I realized the heart makes more sense than my head. The head is just their to cram knowledge and to make sense of things, But its merely a passenger in life and life really is within in the heart. When I started to live in the heart its like a whole different world opened up I wasn't used to. What was i missing? And even though the movies make love all roses and fluffy bears its really not like that. Its much, much more and very different than what the worlds conditioning is to what love is.

When you live in the heart you gain understand, compassion and find yourself less negative, less mad at people, Sure you are going to get upset but it doesn't have that grip it used to, It goes a totally different way, but than you learn to see what its trying to teach as well.

I start to see love from a spiritual level and no longer from the world perspective of love. And in seeing this way their really is such a thing as "Heaven on Earth"